We all struggle with self-confidence from time to time, some more than others. The root of your feelings of self-confidence lie in the way you feel you sit in society. If there’s something unusual about yourself, people tend to notice this and it can make you feel like less of yourself.
What you need to be thinking, instead of worrying about what other people think, is: “I can have self-confidence without needing to rely on others for it.” Feeling a sense of self-worth will only ever come from you. You can avoid feeling down in the dumps and start feeling like a rockstar again with these few simple steps.
Health and Well Being
First and foremost, confidence is something that comes from within – your brain, that is. The right combination of a healthy diet and exercise can go a long way to making you feel stronger, more energetic, more positive and more able to concentrate on day to day tasks.
When you begin a regimen of living healthy and exercising you begin to set yourself goals and achieve things you never thought you could before. As an example, start running for 20 minutes a day and increase your limit each month by 10 minutes. In a 4 months you could running straight for an hour!
Exercise isn’t just about looking good and being slim. It boosts your immune system too and can be a space to clear your thoughts on difficult days. Before you know it, your escape could be the gym.
A surefire way to become a more confident person is to take up new lessons. No one knows everything and the world is full of interesting things to learn. By empowering yourself with knowledge you gain control of yourself and your place in the world.
We all learn differently, whether through reading, taking classes or watching videos. Think about the way you were taught at school. Did it work for you? Do you have a style of learning? If you can’t think of one, try a few and see which one works best.
Positivity and confidence go hand in hand. That’s not to say one controls the other but that you need them both together. Saying yes is a big part of that.
Opportunities exist everywhere for those who choose to see them and sometimes that just starts with saying yes. Think about how many times you’ve said no in the last month. Yes to an invitation, yes to a request or yes to a favor. Not a lot?
Start going out more, doing more for others and experiencing more in your life. Help an old lady cross the road and take the time to listen to someone’s problems without comparing them to your own. Positivity is circular and you will see yourself becoming increasingly able to do things you never previously thought you could!
Strut Your Stuff
Self-confidence is as much about what you feel as it is about the way you carry yourself. Your confidence should extrude from your pores and cover the people around you.
Start by simply smiling more often, smile as often as you can, in fact. A smile is very contagious and you will see the change in the atmosphere around you straight away. Now that you’re oozing confidence from your face, it’s time to ooze it from your body.
I’m not talking fashion here, I’m talking about feeling fresh and wearing clothes that make you feel good. People with low self-confidence tend to wear baggy clothes, and because they don’t feel confident enough to go shopping, they will have an older wardrobe. All you have to do is give your wardrobe an update every 4 months or so and keep your clothes clean and tidy. Stick to what you’re comfortable with. You don’t have to go with the fashion, just be yourself.
Go For a Walk
If you haven’t already experienced the relaxation and calming effect that a good walk has, I recommend you go for one immediately. If you live near where you work and you drive, drop your car and start walking to work. Enjoy the scenery of watching the world go by with music in your ears. The great thing about it is that you can zone the world out but still watch it go by around you.
No matter where you live, you can always find a nice route to take a walk. It doesn’t have to be every day but try to get out of the house for some fresh air at least once a week.
Keep Eye Contact
Shy and unconfident people find it hard to look people in the eye when they talk to them. By looking people in the eye you are connecting with them and showing them that you are trustworthy and friendly. This increases your chances of making friends and meeting people.
A great way to practice this is when you start going for walks. When walking, look ahead instead of down at your feet. Look left and right, enjoy the sights and when people walk past try to get a few seconds eye contact before giving a smile and a nod. The three together can make for a great way to feel more confident.
Show ‘em With Your Body
Your body can say a lot about your self-confidence. There’s even evidence to suggest that your body language shapes the way you feel. If you spend too much time hunching over and crossing your arms, your body is telling people that you don’t want to connect or communicate.
On the reverse side of this, if you lean back in a more relaxed pose and keep your arms open you are signaling that you are open to communication and intimacy. These are primal instincts and are routed deep within our brains so the signals are much more unconscious.
Say Your Mantra
Ever heard of the placebo effect? It’s when your mind convinces you that you are doing something when in reality you aren’t. Many studies have shown that when patients are given a pill and told it will make them better (when in reality the pill is made of sugar) they actually overcome their illnesses.
The power of positive thinking can actually change your physical attributes, but the power has to be strong and it takes time. Try reading this mantra from Mind Body Green in front of the mirror every day and see how you feel after a few weeks.
- Confidence comes through action.
- The only approval you need is your own.
- The fastest way to improve self-confidence is to do the exact thing you fear.
- Accept everything you are — and aren’t. That is true happiness.
- At the end of the day, what matters most is how you see yourself.
- What others say is a reflection of them, not you.
- You are good enough.
- It isn't who you are that holds you back; it's who you think you aren't.
- No one can make you feel unworthy without your permission.
- There is only one you for all time. Fearlessly be your true self. You matter.
Being thankful for something is a great way to build self-confidence. It reminds you that you aren’t in this world alone and that people are always contributing to your happiness. It also takes away the feelings of pride or jealousy as you begin to realize even some of the worst situations aren’t so bad.
It’s also a great thing to be appreciated and people who you thank will begin to appreciate you more. What goes around comes around!
We all love to be complimented. It makes us feel like we’re on top of the world, even if we don’t have the confidence to back it up a compliment can make your day. So why should we always be fishing out compliments from others instead of giving them ourselves. It’s the old tale of “it’s better to give than receive.”
You won’t believe the effect that giving happiness has on your own happiness.
Be aware that you don’t have to jump in head first doing everything mentioned in this eGuide. Take each step one at a time, the first part is always hardest but soon enough you’ll hit your stride and be on the path to feeling like a full blown rockstar.