Confidence and Personality
Imagine the most confident person you can think of. He does what he feels is right, whether or not society agrees with him. He’s not afrai d to be himself, even when surrounded by people who might not understand him. He doesn’t judge those around him; instead, he offers help wherever he can. He strives to improve himself while accepting his flaws.
This supremely confident person could have any personality type – confidence is not dependent on how extraverted or introverted you are, or whether you uphold tradition or look to the future. Confidence comes from accepting and utilizing your individual strengths without concern for the opinion of others.
As an INFJ, you can take advantage of your personality type to develop confidence in your own unique ways.
INFJ’s Biggest Confidence Shakers
INFJs have a rare and special personality type. They are highly intuitive and often have natural insights into people and situations. They are very gentle and caring people who always try to avoid hurting anyone. Their extremely intuitive nature makes them sensitive to conflict, and they therefore tend to hold back much of themselves for protection. Some will feel that it is difficult to fit into society, due to their private nature coupled with their extraordinarily intuitive capabilities.
A Rare Type
The INFJ personality type is one of the rarest, and therefore least understood by other people. As introverts, they are hesitant to open up to people, and because they have very low tolerance for conflict and criticism, they tend to hold themselves back from others. They’ve also learned through experience that people have a hard time understanding them, which makes them even more hesitant to show their true selves.
INFJs are unique, deep, and complex individuals. Sometimes their extremely intuitive nature is even a mystery to themselves. But they make great friends, partners, teachers, or counsellors, because they have a keen insight into people and situations and intuitively understand what others easily miss. They can use their insightful understanding about a situation to create a successful plan of action. Their empathy and genuine concern for others gives them an opportunity to be true servants for people in whatever way they choose – as doctors, therapists, or ministers, as examples.
INFJs are highly intuitive – so much so that they might be considered psychic. This is largely because of their uncanny insight into the world, which they come to trust completely as they grow older. They know that their feelings are usually correct, and they trust their intuitions strongly because of that.
The combination of introversion and strong intuition can become overwhelming for an INFJ. As an intuitive introvert, they are constantly gathering information and considering everything from multiple perspectives. INFJs put a lot of energy into identifying the best way to get things done, and they continually re-define the priorities in their lives. They may feel overwhelmed by the constant bombardment of new information, which they feel they must thoroughly consider and sort out. Being intelligent people, they’re able to go into depth about any topic they find interesting, and they always want to fold new information into their inner world.
The result of this psychic bombardment is that an INFJ will cut off some sources of information. If something doesn’t match up with what’s already been processed and declared true, the INFJ will dismiss it out of hand because they so readily trust their established intuitions and have no room for conflicting ideas.
An INFJ who is overwhelmed with their introverted intuition can become intolerant of others. Believing so fully in their own insights, INFJs can be quick to dismiss outside ideas. In combination with their tendency to hold themselves back from other people, they might appear to be very tense and unfriendly towards others without even realizing it. This can quickly get out of control because INFJs have high expectations of themselves and don’t deal with criticism very well.
INFJs might experience a feedback loop of being misunderstood. They can have a hard time expressing their thoughts because they’re rooted so deeply in their intuitions. Having such a rare personality type, other people can’t easily understand them to begin with. This can make them feel that there’s no point in trying to process outside sources of input.
The best way for an INFJ to solve these issues is to apply their Judgement trait in a more constructive manner. INFJs should use their judgement to support their intuition rather than to dismiss ideas. They must give themselves enough time to process new ideas before they decide to integrate or reject the information.
An INFJ’s experience of not fitting into society is largely created by not knowing how they come across to people, and by having too high of expectations for themselves and others. Both of these issues stem from becoming too overwhelmed and dismissing information that they should be processing internally. They may become too opinionated, especially on subjects that they’re passionate about, and then become upset or agitated when things don’t meet their high expectations, lashing out with biting sarcasm. Since INFJs genuinely do care about others, this situation is devastating for them.
The following are some tips that will help INFJs prevent this kind of problematic situation:
- Be aware that you have a tendency to shut down when you feel overwhelmed. If you get to that point, take a break.
- Make sure to listen carefully to a person’s ideas before passing judgement on them. Do whatever it takes to thoroughly understand the idea.
- When talking with another person, take a moment to focus on the individual. Assess the person’s attitude and feelings. Be aware of the entire person.
- If you become upset, walk away immediately. Only return when you’ve calmed down. An INFJ in an agitated state does not have the capability to be productive.
An INFJ who is interested in personal growth and takes steps toward understanding their personality can significantly improve their confidence and life experience. INFJs are rare and intelligent individuals who are creative, insightful, and gifted in ways that other types are not. They are natural nurturers who are patient, devoted, and protective of the important people in their lives. They are loving parents, friends, and partners. They have natural talent for arts, sciences, and anything that lets them make use of their intuition. An INFJ can boost their confidence by accepting their gifts, allowing themselves to serve others in any way they see fit, and giving themselves enough time to process and integrate new information.
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